My penultimate radiation session is in the books, and I am
still learning new information about this process.
But first thing’s first: Carle was back from her trip to
Minnesota. It was so great to have her
back, and did she ever pull a rabbit out of her musical hat for me today! A few weeks ago, I happened to mention that I
positively adore The Spinners. That crazy B remembered, so today,
I got “I’ll Be Around.” What a treat.
After treatment, I had another talk with Alice, my radiation
oncologist. She again looked at my skin
and again pronounced it healing as she would expect. I’ll be seeing her again in about a month,
but in the meantime, she asked if I had spoken with Ali, my medical oncologist,
about Tamoxifen. Sigh.
Tamoxifen is an
estrogen-blocker that most women with estrogen receptor positive cancer –
like mine -- take post-radiation. It’s pretty much the standard of care these
days, and it boasts some impressive results:
women who take it for 5 years experience fewer instances of cancer
recurrences in the original breast, and also 30-50% fewer cancers in the other
one. Sounds like a no-brainer.
The problem is that Tamoxifen also comes with some gnarly
side-effects. There are the quality of
life issues, like 5 years’ worth of hot flashes, not to mention vaginal
discharge. But there’s also the more serious risks of blood clots and
a huge increase in the risk of uterine cancer.
I already have a genetic mutation that makes me more prone to blood
clots, and I don’t see the point in trading one cancer for another. So I’m on the fence about this very powerful
drug. I will be seeing Ali at the end of
October, and we’ll talk more about it then.
In the meantime, it’s one more decision that I will need to make
regarding my on-going treatment.
I also learned that radiation can (directly or indirectly) affect
appetite. I had never heard any mention
of appetite this whole time, and assumed that was only connected to
chemotherapy…which is why I didn’t understand why my appetite has been so weird lately! For at least a week now, the only food that
actually sounds good to me is fruit.
Now, I have always been a bit produce lover, so that’s not weird. But what’s weird is that I want produce to
the exclusion of just about everything else.
And that definitely is weird,
because I have never been the kind of
girl to shy away from food. And it’s not
even all produce – just fruit.
Vegetables hold no appeal at all right now. And every time I try to eat any animal
protein (I eat chicken, turkey, and fish), I feel like more than a few bites is
going to make me nauseous.
I’m not sure what the nausea is about; nothing in the
radiation treatment should be
upsetting my stomach. But I learned
today that loss of appetite is often connected with radiation because of the
extreme fatigue the treatment causes: treatment
causes fatigue and fatigue causes lack of appetite. So at least that part makes sense. I have also been dehydrated lately, which
might explain why I am eating my body weight in watermelon and grapes and other
watery fruits. But it feels seriously
bizarre to not want to eat.
The good news about all of this is that I first got wind of
it from my discharge instructions. That’s
right: discharge instructions, baby! While my last treatment isn’t until tomorrow,
today was the day I got all my follow-up information, and I kept feeling like
the girl who was only one vote away from being prom queen. Halleluiah!
And then there’s the fact that one of the radiation
therapists, who takes his extracurricular jobs very seriously, likes to change
out the pictures on the radiation doors every month, always on a theme. This month is crime fighting duos. One door has Crocket and Tubbs from Miami
Vice, one has Scully and Moulder from X-Files, and then there’s Crimefighter
Carle, A/K/A Cagney and motherfuckin’
Lacey. I really couldn’t ask for a
better team.
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